I recently signed up with Facebook. Due to sick kids, work deadlines, and other life issues (a.k.a our pool installation and a visit from the in laws) I've been too busy to even slap up a proper page with photos or anything personal there yet. Yet with just my name out there, I am shocked at how many people have emailed me. Old college buddies, a few former coworkers, some cousins. Nice. But then today an email from C., a former friend during high school, landed in my box. Yikes.
I wish I could write a generic version of exactly what happened between C. and I, so that people could understand the nature of my dilemma now without baring the naked, ugly details. But to simply say "C. betrayed me" doesn't do it justice. I think I have to give the skeleton of the details for perspective. Which makes me feel edgy and a little flummoxed ... but here goes:
C. and I were pretty good friends throughout high school. In college I was roommates with another of our mutual high-school friends, Z. During one of those stereotypical train wrecks of a party in my junior year of college, I drank waaaay too much and passed out. While unconscious, Z.'s boyfriend firstname.lastname@example.org me*. But Z.'s boyfriend denied the se.x wasn't consensual. Z. believed him. One long-term aftermath of this was that my old high-school clique split into two factions: one that still associated with Z. and immediately dropped me, and one that shunned Z. out of disgust, since they believed I wouldn't lie about the r.@pe.
C was part of the Z. camp. I never actually heard that she called me a liar directly, but even so, she never spoke or wrote to me again after she found out about it. That's pretty much calling me a liar with her actions, if not her words. And now there is a breezy, dippity-do-dah type email in my inbox from C. saying "Hi, at last! I was wondering where you landed and now I see it's the West Coast! I'm doing blah-blah-blah in X state ..."
How is one supposed to respond to an email like that, given what went down so many years ago?
Really, I'm at a loss at the moment. Opinions would be greatly appreciated.
*Also stereotypical was my 21-year-old reaction to the r@.pe. I didn't go to the ER for an exam and never reported it to the police. So it was my word against his when I finally shared my story with friends.